A Mason's Work

[00:00] And so you've probably heard on this channel over the course of the last several years,
[00:08] me say things like don't get attached to outcomes.
[00:12] Getting attached to outcomes is a challenge for a lot of people and really a nightmare
[00:17] scenario long term.
[00:19] And the reason for this, of course, is that if you get attached to outcomes and the work
[00:27] you do doesn't go your way because you don't get the outcome you want, you run afoul of
[00:31] stopping the effort.
[00:33] You get rejected, disappointed, what have you, and then just basically stop doing the thing.
[00:39] That is very difficult for a lot of folks because we are pushed towards mindset in the
[00:48] sort of everyday life that we have to the only thing that matters is the outcome.
[00:53] It's your, you know, it's the number on a scale.
[00:56] It's the number in your bank account.
[00:58] It's, you know, the number of cars in your garage.
[01:03] And that focus distracts you from what is probably the single most important part of the entire
[01:12] process.
[01:13] And that is living.
[01:16] I know, I know, it sounds crazy, but you're supposed to enjoy this stuff.
[01:21] Not the having of things, but the process of acquiring these things.
[01:27] This shift from outcomes to process changes the way you approach all sorts of challenges.
[01:36] You're probably, and this is a kind of a cold, hard truth for a lot of folks.
[01:43] You're probably never going to love the suffering part of the conversation.
[01:50] Right.
[01:52] Right.
[01:52] Uh, the, the strain of lifting weights at the gym, the strain of learning a better way
[02:00] to navigate conflict, the emotional turmoil of coming to grips with somebody who's toxic
[02:08] in your life and having to manage that.
[02:11] There is a ton of realities that happen, uh, along the way towards these outcomes that
[02:19] everyone else is describing on social media as, uh, you know, just do this.
[02:24] There's an instant formula, you know, X plus Y equals Z.
[02:27] And that's almost never true because your life is yours.
[02:34] The processes that you need to cook are for you.
[02:39] And there is no repeatable formula.
[02:43] And I say that with a strong sense of caveats and stuff like that.
[02:48] Um, there are some things that work for most people move more, eat less, right?
[02:55] Or take medicine, whatever the case may be.
[02:57] These are all easy and obvious and legitimate steps that everyone who has been successful
[03:03] at say weight loss has followed.
[03:06] But beyond that, eat less, move more.
[03:11] There is a ton.
[03:12] Oh, what's the phrase?
[03:13] The devil's in the details.
[03:15] There's a ton of nuance there.
[03:17] And you see, if you go online and you look lots of folks fighting over the details of the
[03:24] nuance, eat this, don't eat that.
[03:26] This food's magical.
[03:27] This food's not magical.
[03:28] This food's awful for you.
[03:30] This one causes cancer.
[03:31] This one causes you to have, you know, psychic powers, whatever the case may be.
[03:36] Those sort of nuanced details in a lot of ways, um, should be kind of disregarded.
[03:43] Uh, this, this doesn't mean, you know, uh, go eat, you know, mercury because you think
[03:49] it's tasty.
[03:50] This means don't listen to all of that noise and mistake that for the magic solution.
[03:59] There isn't one.
[04:00] The magic solution is the one that you cook for yourself that works for you.
[04:05] The way you're going to make that work is you're going to start like an entered apprentice.
[04:11] You're going to start as a rough ashlar.
[04:13] You're going to find the easiest way to move the goal, the objective forward without, again,
[04:24] without attaching to that objective as the only purpose.
[04:27] There are some, again, some obvious behaviors that will help you move the conversation forward.
[04:33] For example, eat less, move more, uh, to, uh, you know, to help build a, uh, a body that
[04:38] works for, you know, you achieving greater outcomes, longevity, et cetera, you know, better
[04:43] cognitive benefits.
[04:44] You take that, uh, that overall desire, right?
[04:49] I have a desire to have a body that facilitates my goals.
[04:52] And then you go backwards and you say, okay, it's obvious I need to move more.
[04:57] What can I do?
[04:59] Don't go find the magic exercise that's going to fix it.
[05:04] Uh, because there isn't one, uh, don't go find or looking for the one magic supplement
[05:11] that, you know, I'm missing this in my life.
[05:13] Uh, you know, eat vegetables and fruits and, you know, the appropriate amount of protein
[05:20] and that's good.
[05:22] And what's the appropriate amount?
[05:23] There's general guidance on this.
[05:25] Don't look for specifics.
[05:26] Look for the general guidance because your body is going to respond differently.
[05:30] Your needs are going to be different.
[05:32] This is why almost every YouTuber online, uh, or podcaster or anybody in a field that has
[05:39] even a little bit of nuance to it will say, I am not a doctor or I am not a lawyer or
[05:43] I am not, you know, a professional in this space.
[05:46] I'm telling you what worked for me.
[05:48] Well, that's great.
[05:49] It may have worked for that person, uh, but it may not work for you.
[05:53] So drop all that noise and start with the easiest thing you can do.
[05:59] The smallest practical possible step.
[06:01] And we talked about this a little bit last week, find the baby step for you.
[06:08] And don't worry about how much it moves the needle.
[06:12] The, the, the only needle you really need to monitor for is, um, can I keep doing this
[06:19] on a daily basis?
[06:20] Is this something that, that I can, uh, build into my life?
[06:26] If the answer to that question is yes, good.
[06:29] Then you can maybe expand, add on it, grow it over time, make it something stronger, make
[06:34] it something better.
[06:35] But you're not in a place when you're just starting out to go and consume that nuanced
[06:41] research that somebody may have conducted that may be entirely scientifically valid.
[06:46] Uh, you're not there yet.
[06:47] You're just starting out, put on that apron and get attached to the idea that you're going
[06:54] to try a bunch of stuff and whatever works, whatever feels right, uh, is going to be the
[07:01] place that you start.
[07:02] Uh, and then you start collecting better data and all that kind of stuff that's going
[07:05] to happen with good process refinement.
[07:07] And you're going to achieve those outcomes.
[07:09] Um, but, but don't, again, don't get mired up in that magic pill solution stuff that comes
[07:16] your way because, uh, there's lots of folks out there trying to sell you the magic answer.
[07:23] Uh, you know, take this, take this supplement, take this drug, take, you know, uh, lift this
[07:28] weight in this certain way, uh, go do this exercise.
[07:32] And again, we use weight loss here.
[07:33] This isn't a weight loss channel, but we use weight loss because it's, um, cause it's so
[07:37] well explored.
[07:38] It's so well, uh, discovered out there in the space.
[07:41] The same process applies for all things.
[07:45] If you suck at having conversations and it's okay to suck at having conversations, start with
[07:51] how do I have a conversation?
[07:53] Well, I need to be able to be in a room with somebody and that's going to be a challenge for
[07:57] me because I don't like it.
[08:00] It makes me feel anxious.
[08:01] Okay, cool.
[08:01] Let's break down what the anxiety is.
[08:03] Let's figure out what's causing it.
[08:04] For me, for example, if I don't wear earplugs, the overall background noise, because I have
[08:09] ADHD actually makes it very difficult to hear just the one conversation.
[08:14] I hear them all at the same volume.
[08:16] So a big thing for me to reduce my sinusoidal anxiety actually is to put in, ironically enough,
[08:21] earplugs that help me focus on just one conversation at a time.
[08:25] There's little solutions like this.
[08:27] Again, as you approach solving issues in your life, trying to create better quality, you
[08:33] know, moment by moment, uh, life experience, you're going to need to start to get these
[08:39] little feedback mechanisms go and then reach for information and data that you can use to
[08:44] make small little changes that you can repeat forever and iterate on to improve them.
[08:49] Uh, that's the mechanic.
[08:51] That's the way this works.
[08:52] Uh, if you learn nothing more from this channel, if you do nothing else with the content of what
[08:56] we talk about here, uh, you just, if you can master that, if you can master the art of the
[09:02] start on this stuff, uh, you have already beaten the game.