A Mason's Work

[00:00] Last week, we started down the path to build a business case, not just for how, but what
[00:08] it means to really trust yourself.
[00:11] We didn't really talk a ton about what that leads to, and that's what I want to spend
[00:15] some time on today.
[00:18] If you think about it, if you don't trust yourself, everything you're building in your
[00:26] life is on a, at best, shifting sands level of foundation.
[00:34] And self-trust is really hard because, again, one of the realities is you're the easiest
[00:40] person to lie to, particularly when you're lying to yourself.
[00:44] So when we talk about the benefits here, the foundational benefit is you get to a bedrock
[00:54] level of understanding.
[00:57] When you can be honest with yourself and know what that means, know where you stand, know
[01:02] what you feel, and not retreat from that and not label it as something other than what it
[01:07] is, even when those labels are unpleasant, you begin the process of being able to create
[01:14] stability in a world of instability.
[01:17] Now, I recognize that might be challenging.
[01:21] Again, this is a lifelong quest to become more honest with yourself, more understanding.
[01:28] When we start to build this, though, we begin to create the foundation for what I'll call
[01:35] the integrated man, the person who, or integrated person, right?
[01:41] The person who can know how they feel, know where they stand, and act accordingly.
[01:49] That is this integration, that integral part of the way we approach the world that allows
[02:00] us to meaningfully begin creating relationships based on something that is solid.
[02:07] So when we can admit our mistakes, when we can identify when we're being greedy, when we can
[02:14] identify when some of our behaviors aren't in line with our beliefs, and then act from that
[02:22] knowledge, we can have relationships that matter.
[02:26] We can build bonds that turn into meaningful, powerful tools that can help us grow and can
[02:36] help us shape a stronger and better world around us.
[02:38] There's a really good model that leverages somebody who's fully kind of integrated when it comes
[02:48] to things like contracting and building commitments with other people.
[02:52] It's a book by Fred Kaufman named Conscious Business, or it's called Conscious Business.
[02:57] And really, it talks about how to effectively make commitments and hold to those commitments,
[03:05] not just from a contractual perspective, but from a kind of a moral perspective, where you
[03:15] make something called an impeccable commitment.
[03:18] And these impeccable commitments are, you are clear about the structure for handling the
[03:25] commitment before it starts, what happens if it goes awry, what you're going to do to mitigate
[03:31] those potential deviations from the norm.
[03:35] This integral process, this integrative process allows you to have relationships that can withstand
[03:44] commitments that don't work out, which is also really important.
[03:50] So it's not just about making commitments where you kind of always stick the landing.
[03:53] It's about understanding that fair amount of the commitments we make in our life are based
[04:00] on intention.
[04:01] I have the intention to do a thing, but circumstances may prevent that from happening or my own,
[04:08] you know, priority shifts may prevent that from happening.
[04:11] And so we're going to explore over the course of this week, some of the ways we can use this
[04:20] self-knowledge to strengthen the relationships with the people around us so that we can build
[04:28] bonds that, that can withstand the adversities of everyday life that can be built on a foundation
[04:35] of something that is true and honest and intentional, and then turn into what really this, the kind of
[04:44] purpose of relationships is for people, which is to help each other.
[04:50] Grow and become the best person we can be, help each other with labor, help each other in
[04:56] sort of all the capacities in which human beings as social animals are kind of out there to do.
[05:02] So we'll go more into the breakdown on this throughout the rest of the week.
[05:07] See you tomorrow.