From Stone to Ashlar: Softening the Hardened Heart
Download MP3In tumultuous times, it is easy to harden ourselves against pain and call it strength. But endurance without openness risks becoming pride in suffering for its own sake. In this episode, we explore how the Craft reframes suffering not as identity, but as catalyst—inviting us to soften the heart of stone and move toward refinement, compassion, and true growth.
🔑 Key Takeaways
- Enduring suffering without transformation can calcify into pride, not progress
- A hardened heart resists connection and care, severing the deeper work of the Craft
- Growth requires softening, allowing suffering to refine rather than define us
💬 Featured Quotes
- 0:00:00 – “We live in very tumultuous times… and the natural response to this, however, is to harden your heart.”
- 0:00:18 – “It is popular to act in a way that prefers survivorship bias, where you endure outrageous amounts of suffering.”
- 0:00:32 – “Culturally, you’ll see it in different national cultures, in subcultures, where people take pride in the amount of suffering they are able to withstand and endure.”
- 0:00:45 – “We’ve talked about the value and the role of suffering as a catalyst for development—but when you harden, you stop growing.”
🔗 Explore Related Episodes
- The Rough Ashlar and the Burden: Making Sense of Challenge and Suffering
— On chosen and unchosen struggle as tools of refinement. - When Willpower Fails: Rethinking the Virtue of Struggle
— Challenges the cultural narrative of pride in suffering. - The Trowel: Building Connections That Last
— Explores the necessity of care and compassion in balancing endurance.
Creators and Guests

Host
Brian Mattocks
Host and Founder of A Mason's Work - a podcast designed to help you use symbolism to grow. He's been working in the craft for over a decade and served as WM, trustee, and sat in every appointed chair in a lodge - at least once :D
