Dark Rhetoric Series – Tone Policing: How Control Masquerades as Civility
Download MP3When emotion enters a conversation, truth often follows close behind — but so does discomfort. In this episode, we examine tone policing, a manipulative tactic that silences authenticity under the guise of calm. By exploring how this rhetorical maneuver transforms vulnerability into disqualification, we uncover what genuine civility truly demands of us.
🔑 Key Takeaways
- Tone policing disguises control as reasonableness, punishing emotional honesty.
- Emotional expression often signals proximity to truth, not a departure from it.
- Authentic dialogue requires discomfort — not suppression — to achieve understanding.
💬 Featured Quotes
- 0:00:10 — “When you are in a conversation that gets emotionally heated, a manipulator may try to ruin it by policing the tone.”
- 0:00:44 — “They’ll say things like, ‘You’re getting emotional,’ or, ‘We’re all too emotional to move forward.’”
- 0:01:22 — “Tone policing is an assertion of dominance — it’s a way to control not just the message, but the legitimacy of the speaker.”
- 0:02:10 — “The appearance of calm isn’t always the presence of wisdom.”
🔗 Explore Related Episodes
- Dark Rhetoric Series – Weaponized Ignorance: When Not Knowing Becomes a Shield
Explores how feigned ignorance is used to derail accountability and disarm honest dialogue. - Charity Starts Where?
Investigates how self-care and internal honesty form the foundation for authentic generosity. - Barefoot in the Lodge
A meditation on vulnerability, humility, and the courage it takes to bring your whole self into Masonic work.
Dynamic Inserts
Creators and Guests
Host
Brian Mattocks
Host and Founder of A Mason's Work - a podcast designed to help you use symbolism to grow. He's been working in the craft for over a decade and served as WM, trustee, and sat in every appointed chair in a lodge - at least once :D
